


An Expert Touch

by walkwithursus



Category: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
Genre: Dressing Room Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, First Time, Fondling, Gender or Sex Swap, Lingerie, Semi-Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:28:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26171965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/walkwithursus/pseuds/walkwithursus
Summary: Nandor insists on accompanying Guillermo lingerie shopping. Alone in the dressing room and down to the last ill-fitting bra, she suggests an unconventional method for ascertaining the proper fit.
Relationships: Guillermo de la Cruz/Nandor the Relentless
Comments: 39
Kudos: 90





	An Expert Touch

**Author's Note:**

> Shout out to [sistermichael](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sistermichael/pseuds/sistermichael) for the wonderful beta!

It had all started because the underwire in Guillermo’s favorite bra had broken, poking out through the fabric and gouging her in the chest. This was a somewhat regular occurrence for her, given that she usually wore her bras into the ground, but on this unfortunate occasion she hadn’t had a clean spare, and had been forced to wear it as she roused her master and dressed her for the evening.

Guillermo should have known better than to complain in front of Nandor. But her frequent mutterings and wiggles of discomfort had eventually necessitated an explanation, which had been the biggest mistake of all. Nothing was ever a little thing to Nandor, and one-off comments were usually turned into giant ordeals. That, combined with the fact that Nandor loved to monitor her familiar as she shopped, meant a trip to the lingerie store at nine o'clock at night.

Guillermo had tried to protest, promising Nandor that she would fix the underwire issue by simply sewing it closed, but Nandor wouldn’t hear it. 

“How can you be expected to do your job if you are not having the proper support? It’s no wonder the dust has been piling up,” Nandor had said, gesturing disdainfully to the pristine chandelier overhead as she had swept toward the front door with Guillermo in tow.

And that was how Guillermo found herself in the fitting room of one of New York City’s most luxurious lingerie stores, trying on a variety of fancy bras that were far and above her Walmart price range. 

Despite the fact that it was an hour till closing, the sales lady had been very helpful, taking Guillermo into the dressing room and measuring her for the ‘proper fit.’ Nandor had sulked outside the entire time, loath to be shut out of what she had referred to under her breath as a “sexy naked party.” Guillermo hadn’t bothered to correct her, and prayed that the poor, 60-something year old saleswoman hadn’t heard her either. 

The measuring part was awkward. Guillermo had never had an official measurement taken before, but she was excited by the prospect of trying on bras in her official size in a place that actually carried it. Once that part was over with, she had trailed Nandor around the store, watching with raised eyebrows as the vampire plucked a variety of matching lingerie sets down from their displays and tossed them into Guillermo’s mesh shopping bag.

Guillermo had saved her favorite to try on last. The bra was mint green with little lace roses on the cups in a soft baby pink. It was the prettiest, most feminine bra she had ever seen above a D cup, and she felt cute and slightly giddy just looking at it. Unfortunately, as soon as she’d done the clasp behind her back, she realized that the straps were far too thin and would be digging lines into her shoulders in no time. 

“How are they looking, Guillermo?” Nandor called from outside the door. 

“Um… I’m not sure yet,” Guillermo replied, sawing into her lower lip with her teeth. She turned to the side and appraised herself in the mirror, noting the way the tops of her breasts spilled out of the cups with a frown. At least the matching underwear fit.

“Can I see yet?” 

Guillermo hesitated. Nandor had been knocking on the door every thirty seconds or so for the last fifteen minutes, more than a little put out at being asked to remain outside. Guillermo knew from experience that Nandor hated feeling left out, but this was one situation she had figured she could get away with demanding a little privacy. 

“Hang on,” Guillermo said at length, tugging her skirt and sweater on and smoothing them awkwardly over the lingerie set. “Just a second.” 

More or less presentable, Guillermo finally undid the latch on the fitting room door and cracked it open. 

Nandor slipped inside.

“Oh, I was going to come out and model it for you,” Guillermo said, watching as Nandor wrestled the latch back into place. The tiny fitting room barely had enough room for one normal sized person, let alone Guillermo and her master’s six-foot frame. 

“Ah yes, and give the sales lady another show? I don’t think so,” said Nandor, spinning around and crossing her arms. She stared appraisingly at Guillermo. “Now. Show me.” 

Guillermo’s stomach suddenly swarmed with butterflies, and she averted her gaze. _She doesn’t want to see you strip,_ she reminded herself sternly, shoving the thought to the back of her mind. Taking a deep breath, Guillermo stood as far back as the fitting room would allow and held her hands out by her sides. “Well?”

“You are wearing your sweater.” 

“I know,” said Guillermo, “but that’s how you’ll be seeing it every day, right? So does it look normal under the sweater?”

Nandor swept her gaze critically across Guillermo’s chest, her eyes lingering on the unseemly bulge where Guillermo’s breasts spilled over the cups. “You look uncomfortable,” she said at last. 

“Yeah, it’s a bit tight. The straps are already digging into my shoulders.” Guillermo fidgeted slightly and tried to mask her disappointment. “Oh well. I guess this one’s another ‘no.’”

“ _Another_ no?” Nandor asked, arching a brow. “Didn’t you like any of them?”

“Well, yes, I liked them, but none of them fit properly,” said Guillermo.

Nandor’s upper lip curled back with disdain. “See? What did I tell you? This is what you get when you rely on taping measurers.”

“I’m sure it’s not the tape measurer’s fault. It’s just hard to get the size right, is all. Bras are weird like that.”

“Then don’t wear one.” Nandor shrugged. “I have already told you that I would prefer that you didn’t.”

Guillermo flushed up to her ears. _That_ had been a long and awkward conversation. As a former warrior queen, present-day modesty made no sense to Nandor. She had no shame regarding her own nakedness, and if it weren’t for the fact that clothes were a way of expressing vanity, Guillermo wasn’t sure she’d ever deign to wear a shirt at all. Nandor couldn’t possibly understand why Guillermo had blushed every time she’d dressed her during the early years of her servitude, or why Guillermo still avoided looking directly at her when she attended her in the bath.

“I know,” Guillermo said, puffing out a breath, “but I really don’t think I could go without one. I’ve been wearing them so long, they just feel natural to me.”

“Fine.” Nandor sighed, as though this were inconveniencing her personally. “I still think you would be able to dust much more efficiently without one, but if you insist on wearing your little booby-traps, I will at least help you locate one that fits.” 

“Help me how?” Guillermo asked, eyeing Nandor warily. 

“By measuring you, of course. It is very simple.”

Guillermo blinked. “What? Oh, no. No, you don’t have to do that, Master, really.” 

“Oh, but you will let any random measuring lady in here to do it?”

“That’s different. It’s her job to do that,” Guillermo argued, shooting a quick glance to the closed fitting room door. She lowered her voice to a whisper. “No offense, Master, but you really don’t have any experience doing this.”

Nandor bristled. “Experience? I have 750 _years_ of experience appraising women’s breasts! Do you know how strict the requirements were to become a member of my harem?”

Guillermo sighed. “At least two—”

“—two Qabdhah, yes,” Nandor said, indicating the length of her palm.

Guillermo shook her head. This conversation wasn’t going anywhere, and the store was bound to be closing soon. They had already taken up more than enough of the poor saleswoman’s time as it was. “Maybe we should just go.”

“What, so that you can go back to dusting poorly because of your miserable wired brassiere? I don’t think so.” Nandor put her hands on her hips, and Guillermo had the fleeting impression that if she’d been wearing a sword, she would have been fondling the pommel. “We came all the way out here so that you could purchase one of these ridiculous things, and that’s what we are going to do. Now, it is my turn to do the measuring, and I assure you that I will find you the perfect bra.” 

Guillermo stared hard into her master’s face for a moment, analyzing the stubborn set to her jaw. There was no sense in arguing with her when she got like this. “Alright, fine,” Guillermo sighed, throwing up her hands. “Fine. What do you need to do? Do you have a measuring tape?”

“Don’t need one,” Nandor said simply. “I will use my eyes and my hands.”

“Your—what? You mean you’d look at—and feel?” Guillermo spluttered, her heartbeat picking up. “Is that really necessary?” 

“Do you know a better way?” Nandor asked. 

Guillermo pressed her lips together. This was all happening very fast. More than anything, she wished she could pause time and take a moment to think this through. Instead, she cycled rapidly through her thoughts, and landed on the most coherent one: to have Nandor looking at and touching her at the same time sounded unbearably overwhelming, and she wasn’t sure she could handle such a thing without revealing just how much Nandor excited her. 

“Couldn’t you just do one or the other?” she asked.

“Alright. See them or feel them. You pick,” said Nandor, as if she were being more than generous.

Guillermo hesitated. What was more embarrassing? Letting her master see her naked body or feel it? Obviously there was much to be said for the seeing option, as it would involve less physical contact overall, but the possibility of being judged made her pause. Her boobs certainly didn’t look like the perfectly perky, symmetrical ones glorified in pop culture, but then again, Nandor was from a different era entirely. What were the odds she’d hold Guillermo to standards that she herself might not even know existed? 

No. She definitely wasn’t confident enough to let Nandor see them, which left only one alternative. Guillermo took a steadying breath. Letting her master feel her up in a dressing room was the stuff of fantasy, and she felt guilty for even letting her mind stray in that direction. This was purely practical, nothing more, and it would be wrong of her to take advantage of Nandor’s innocent offer for her own perverse fantasy. 

“Can I at least keep my sweater on while you feel them?” Guillermo asked, only slightly mortified. 

“If you must,” said Nandor, stepping forward in the cramped space.

“And will you keep your eyes closed?” 

Nandor heaved a put-upon sigh. “Yes, yes, fine. No peeking.”

“Do you promise?” 

“Yes, I promise.” 

Guillermo inspected Nandor’s face for signs of trickery, and upon finding none, cleared her throat. “Do you want the bra on or off?”

“Off,” said Nandor, and Guillermo reached up the back of her sweater and undid the clasps before pulling the bra out through the sleeve. Nandor’s eyes widened in delight. “How did you do that?!”

“Practice,” Guillermo said, grinning shyly as she tossed the mint green bra over a hook. Her heartbeat accelerated as she felt her bare breasts brush against the thin, soft material of her sweater, her nipples already embarrassingly hard. “Is this okay?”

Nandor nodded. “Alright, now turn around,” she ordered, and Guillermo obeyed, facing the single tall mirror in the dressing room as Nandor stepped up behind her. Though she couldn’t see Nandor’s reflection in the mirror, she could feel her towering frame pressing up against her back, soft, cool breath tickling her neck.

“Ready?” Nandor asked softly. 

“Are your eyes closed?”

“Yes, yes, they are closed. _Yeesh!_ " 

"Okay, then I'm ready," Guillermo whispered, taking a deep breath. 

When the vampire’s touch came, it was unbearably soft, like the stroke of a feather on top of her clothes. Guillermo had half-expected Nandor to grasp immediately for her chest, and was thus surprised when Nandor began at her shoulders, carefully feeling the slope of them from the collar outwards before running her hands down Guillermo’s arms. Guillermo exhaled shakily and tried to calm her rapid pulse.

“Your muscles are so tight,” Nandor observed, stroking her hands up and down Guillermo’s shoulder blades. “You hunch too much.” 

“Well, maybe if I get a more supportive bra, I won’t have to hunch,” Guillermo replied, unable to imbue her tone with as much bite as she would have under normal circumstances. Nandor’s touch was electrifying, every brush of her fingers sending tingles all throughout her body. 

Slowly, Nandor’s hands came around to Guillermo’s front, tracing lightly along her waist before pausing just under the soft, round swell of her breasts. Guillermo’s breaths were coming short and fast now, and she shuddered slightly at the first gentle, barely-there squeeze.

“So soft,” Nandor remarked, her voice husky and low-pitched. 

“I-is that okay?” Guillermo asked, and then cursed herself mentally for how stupid she sounded. 

“Mmm,” Nandor hefted her breasts in her hands. “Yes. Though I can see why they would be uncomfortable for you. They’re very heavy. Perhaps the heaviest I’ve ever felt.” 

Guillermo flushed with a strange sort of pleasure. Knowing that her body was in any way remarkable to the thousands of others Nandor had presumably come in contact with over the years was somehow extremely validating.

Nandor raised her hands, lifting Guillermo’s breasts until the hem of her sweater began to ride up her stomach. Guillermo twitched to tug it down, but thought better of it, clenching her fingers into fists by her sides. With nimble fingers, Nandor explored the width of her rib cage, circling from front to back and then around again, apparently mapping the size and shape of Guillermo’s torso. A few more moments passed with tender exploration before Nandor’s hands suddenly paused. 

“It is hard for me to get an exact feel through the sweater,” Nandor murmured, her lips very close to Guillermo’s ear. “May I…?”

Guillermo watched in the mirror as the hem of her sweater slowly lifted, revealing the waist of her skirt and a thin strip of brown skin. Nandor’s cool fingertips brushed against her belly, a gentle request. 

“Under the sweater?” Guillermo whispered, and she felt rather than saw Nandor nod beside her, a lock of dark hair tickling her cheek. Her stomach clenched. This was really happening. Nandor was going to touch her— _wanted_ to touch her, to draw her fingers across Guillermo’s bare skin. “...Okay.” 

Guillermo tore her eyes away from her reflection in time to watch Nandor’s hands disappear under her top, snaking slowly upwards until they came into contact with her breasts. A soft, startled gasp slipped past her lips as Nandor’s palms roamed over them, the rough calluses on her hands scratching against the softness of Guillermo’s skin. Nandor’s fingers brushed across her stiff nipples, and Guillermo wished fleetingly that she would pinch them, tug them, pull them until she had no choice but to moan and whine aloud. 

“Your hands are so rough,” she confessed, suppressing a shiver as Nandor thumbed both of her nipples in tandem.

“Too rough?” Nandor asked gruffly, her voice surprisingly hoarser than Guillermo would have expected.

Guillermo shook her head. Her eyes fell shut, and she allowed her body to sag for the first time against the solid weight of her master’s frame. Nandor’s hands continued their exploration, pressing and massaging just hard enough to make her gasp but not so hard as to cause pain. 

Suddenly, the room felt cold around her midriff, and Guillermo’s eyes snapped open in time to catch her sweater climbing up of its own accord in the mirror. Nandor was carefully drawing it up, exposing the waist of Guillermo’s skirt and the soft rolls of her stomach. Within seconds the sweater would climb too high and her breasts would tumble out, naked and on display for her master to see.

Guillermo reached up to cover herself. “Master, wait—”

“Wait?”

“I can’t—”

“You _can._ ”

Guillermo squirmed slightly but lowered her hands back to her sides. With a triumphant groan, Nandor shoved Guillermo’s sweater up to her collar bone, allowing her huge, heavy breasts to spill out of the bottom of her sweater. Guillermo snuck a glance at herself in the mirror and moaned. With her chest exposed she looked utterly indecent, her face beet-red above the endless expanse of warm brown skin. A sharp hiss sounded beside her ear as Nandor’s hands resumed their earlier position, gripping and squeezing harder than ever before. 

“Fu-u-uck,” Guillermo shuddered, squeezing her thighs together under her khaki skirt. A steady throb had begun between her legs, and she wondered briefly if it was possible to come without being touched. "You p-promised you wouldn't look..."

“Oh, _Guillermo,_ ” Nandor purred, tucking her chin against Guillermo’s shoulder and squeezing both breasts in her hands. The pads of her thumbs slid circularly around her large, pinkish-brown nipples. “Were you this shy with the measuring lady?”

“The measuring lady wasn’t t-...touching my nipples,” Guillermo said, darting a nervous glance toward the fitting room door. 

Nandor’s thumbs stopped their circling, and Guillermo could hear the frown in her voice as she asked, “She wasn’t? How could she resist?”

Under any other circumstances, Guillermo would have laughed. “Maybe that’s why she got my size wrong,” Guillermo suggested tentatively, turning her cheek in time to catch a wide, sinister smile spread across her master’s face. 

“Yes, you are probably right Guillermo. That is why I need to conduct a very thorough examination.”

“Right,” Guillermo agreed, leaning her head back against Nandor’s chest. She could feel the swell of Nandor’s bosom against her cheek through the tunic, heaving slightly with the force of breaths she did not need to take. Guillermo wished she had the courage to turn around and strip the shirt off Nandor’s shoulders, so that they might see and touch one another at the same time.

“Are you wearing the matching undergarment?” Nandor asked, yanking Guillermo from her thoughts as she delivered a harsh tug to her nipples. Only Nandor could make the word _undergarment_ sound sexy. 

Guillermo gulped audibly and nodded.

“Perhaps I should feel you there as well… for measuring purposes,” Nandor suggested, her voice darkly persuasive beside Guillermo’s ear.

“R-really?” Guillermo asked, craning her neck around to look into her master’s face. Nandor’s gaze was dark and focused, her mouth slightly agape to reveal the long, pearly white points of her fangs. The urge to kiss her was overwhelming, to snake a hand through her hair and bring their lips together with bruising force, but in the end Guillermo decided not to risk breaking the illusion.

“Yes, the underwear are tight too,” Guillermo said, feeling naughty and sly at the continued pretext. “You’d better measure me down there as well.”

“ _Yesss,_ ” Nandor hissed, already drifting one hand down the curve of Guillermo’s belly until she reached the top of her skirt. A few seconds of fumbling elapsed as Nandor fiddled with the modern fly, eventually resorting to the use of two hands to try tugging it open. “Argh, fuck this shit!” Nandor said eventually, and with the ease of a person tearing a sheet of paper she ripped the two halves of the fly apart. The button flew off and pinged against the mirror before rolling away across the carpet. 

“Master!” Guillermo cried, half-exasperated, half-maddeningly-aroused. “I could have undone it for you.” 

“It would have taken too long,” Nandor said, already shimmying the remains of the skirt down Guillermo’s wide thighs. The mint green panties were completely sheer, with only a small pink bow at the center top. Guillermo blushed slightly to see herself in them as Nandor’s hands encircled her hips, kneading experimentally into her plump waist. 

“Mnnh,” Guillermo moaned, biting her lip as Nandor’s nails dug possessively into her skin. Nandor’s hands slid around to the small of Guillermo’s back before diving lower, grabbing fistfuls of Guillermo’s ass in either hand and pulling her cheeks apart. Guillermo could feel Nandor back away slightly to look down and heard her groan quietly under her breath, evidently overcome by the sight of her own hands groping Guillermo’s asscheeks. 

“Yes, these are rather tight,” Nandor pronounced, working a finger under the waistband of the underwear and letting it snap back against Guillermo’s skin. Guillermo jumped slightly, only to moan as Nandor’s hand skidded around to the front of the panties, plucking experimentally at the bow. Nandor’s other hand returned to her left breast, squeezing tighter as she explored the sheer fabric covering Guillermo’s mound. A single fingertip slipped between her thick thighs to run back and forth across the material covering her slit. 

“Oh fuck,” Guillermo breathed, rocking her hips in time with Nandor’s teasing touch. Nandor increased the gentle pressure of her fingertip, and Guillermo gasped as she stroked circles around her clit through the panties. 

“Can I feel inside?” Nandor breathed, panting heavily into Guillermo’s ear.

Guillermo didn’t even pause to think. “Yes. _Please,_ yes,” she groaned, throwing all caution to the wind.

With a low, sultry hiss, Nandor’s hand dipped beneath the waist of Guillermo’s panties, sliding through her curls and coming to rest against her soaked folds. “Oh, Guillermo,” she breathed, scraping her teeth against her familiar’s neck. “You are so _wet_ for me. You’ve ruined these underwear.” 

“I-I’m sorry,” Guillermo replied, widening her stance to give Nandor’s hand unencumbered access to her. 

“You should be,” Nandor said, spreading her outer lips with her fingers. “Now we’re going to have to buy them.” 

Guillermo choked on a laugh as Nandor stroked a finger through her silky wet folds. The touch was unbearably light; Guillermo wanted to feel Nandor’s fingers inside her, curling and thrusting and opening her as she’d never been before, but instead Nandor teased her with a single digit, dipping slowly in and out as if she were something fragile.

“Master please,” she begged, grinding herself down hard onto Nandor’s hand. “I need…”

“What do you need, Guillermo?” Nandor prompted, squeezing her left breast as she circled Guillermo’s hood with her fingertip. 

“More,” Guillermo gasped. “Harder. _Please._ I want to come for you.” 

“Guillermo! Where did you learn that kind of language?” Nandor had the audacity to sound scandalized as she began rubbing Guillermo’s swollen clit, the pressure mounting with every revolution. 

Guillermo couldn’t bring herself to answer. Her hips were jerking of their own accord now, her breath coming in loud, ragged gulps. Nandor sucked a dark mark onto Guillermo’s neck, and Guillermo could feel the tips of her fangs tickling her skin like dual knife points. Just thinking about being bitten, sharp teeth breaking her skin and burrowing deep into her flesh, was enough to bring her right up to the edge.

“Oh fuck, Master, please! I’m so close. If you keep doing that—” Guillermo cut off, unable to get the rest out without losing control over the volume of her voice.

Nandor squeezed the hand still holding Guillermo’s breast, her nails breaking the soft skin. “Yes,” she said, her breath cool and perfect against Guillermo’s ear. “Come for me, my Guillermo.”

It was all the encouragement Guillermo needed. With a hoarse, barely-there cry, Guillermo let herself come undone, wave after wave of pleasure coursing through her as Nandor slid her fingers expertly along her throbbing clit. Guillermo’s knees buckled under her weight, and she was forced to cling to Nandor’s left wrist to stay upright, her only anchor as her orgasm washed over her. At length the motion of Nandor’s fingers slowed, and she allowed Guillermo to grind against her through the aftershocks, rubbing her slit across Nandor’s fingers until she had wrung herself out completely. 

Seconds passed, or maybe minutes, and Guillermo’s heartbeat began to even out, quieting in her ears until she could make out her own shaky breaths in the enclosed space. To her surprise, Nandor was breathing just as hard behind her, her lips pressed tightly against the thin, sensitive skin beneath Guillermo’s ear. Nandor withdrew her hand from the front of Guillermo’s underwear and held it aloft, glistening with her wetness. Before Guillermo could offer to dry her fingers, Nandor had popped them in her mouth and sucked them clean with an obscene moan. 

“Fuck,” Guillermo whispered shakily, clenching again with a dull ache. 

Without having to be asked, Nandor gently tugged Guillermo’s sweater down over her chest until she was covered. Guillermo made a wordless sound of thanks. The majority of her body weight was still being supported by Nandor’s muscular arms, though when she tested her legs she found that she was able to stand so long as she kept a hand on the dressing room wall. Nandor released her grip slowly until Guillermo had proven that she could stand on her own two feet. 

Suddenly overcome with embarrassment, Guillermo put as much distance between them in the tiny dressing room as the space would allow. She struggled to meet her master’s intense gaze, even as Nandor stroked the sweaty curls off her cheek and tucked them behind her ear. Guillermo crouched to pull her skirt back up and held it closed with one hand. 

“We should probably go,” Guillermo said, her cheeks flaming as she considered how much the lone employee had heard.

“Now?” Nandor asked, surprise lacing her tone. “But I’ve only just learned your size!”

“We can come back another time. I’m pretty sure the store is closing soon. And besides, I don’t really feel like having to hold my skirt up while we shop.”

Nandor had the good grace to look sheepish. Quickly, Guillermo slipped the soaking wet panties down her legs and tugged her normal underwear on, all without taking off her skirt. Despite the intimacy of what had just transpired, she felt suddenly shy again, and nervous at the prospect of letting Nandor view her naked. Unfortunately, she wouldn’t be able to change back into her old bra without taking her sweater off in front of Nandor, so she stuffed it into her purse to deal with later. She’d just keep her arms crossed on the bus ride home. 

“Ready?” Nandor asked, her hand hovering over the door latch.

Guillermo spotted the button to her skirt in the corner and knelt to retrieve it, slipping it into one pocket to be reattached later. “Yup.”

To Guillermo’s immense relief, the saleswoman was nowhere to be found when they exited the dressing room, and they were able to slip out of the shop and onto the street without confrontation. They set off in silence toward the bus stop.

“We can never come back here,” Guillermo muttered to herself, shouldering her bag a little higher and folding her arms self-consciously across her bra-less chest. 

“No, we can’t,” Nandor agreed breezily. “Especially not since I took these.” 

“Master!” 

Nandor was holding the soaking green panties aloft, a lascivious grin stretching her pale face. Guillermo shoved her arm back down and glanced around the busy street, hoping nobody had seen them. 

“You shouldn’t have done that. The sales lady could get in trouble now.” 

“Of course that is what you’re worried about,” Nandor said sullenly. “Your precious sales lady, whose measuring method you so obviously preferred.”

“Oh for goodness—you know she was like seventy, right?” Guillermo asked, throwing Nandor a skeptical glance. “She was old enough to be my grandmother.”

“Exactly. A G-MILF. How can I compete with that?”

Guillermo slapped a hand over her forehead and picked up the pace. It was going to be a long bus ride home.

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first time writing fem smut. I hope it turned out okay! Thanks for reading.


End file.
